6. When I grow up, I want to be…

You may or may not know that I recently graduated from college May of this year. You may or may also not know that I just landed a six-month internship with a digital marketing agency. From what it sounds, it seems like I’m doing great and slowly setting my foot on the right path instead of getting lost with the crowd. However, I still often think whether or not I’m making the right decisions for myself.

Having landed a job in the span of one month right after college doesn’t seem bad at all. It’s still better than staying at home, being a couch potato, and living the unemployed life. Many of my blockmates from the university told me how lucky I am for getting an experience (that doesn’t suck at all when it comes to salary) so quickly and smoothly. And I think so too. Not only do I get paid well, I also attain that work-life balance that everyone wants. I have wonderful and intelligent people surrounding me that are so much fun to be with in the office, and I have the best boss I could ask for. He motivates me every time he could and never lets me feel as if I’m at the bottom of the food chain. He lets his employees shine in their own little ways and also makes sure we’re having fun on whatever we are doing. Sounds like it’s the job for keeps, eh? Somehow, it’s not.

Whilst I’m grateful for this internship and the training I get, I couldn’t stop thinking of the other possibilities and opportunities out there where I will get to pursue my passion. Before landing this job, there was a hanging offer for me to write and the benefits are good (I mean goooooood), but something tells me not to accept this job yet and go on with the internship. So I did. I followed my guts. I’d be lying if I said that the thought of getting to write at work doesn’t haunt me. I still wonder what it feels like doing something you love and earning something from it. Did I make the wrong choice? Would it be the first step to my ultimate dream job and I just let it slip out of my hand?

My dream job may sound absurd and kind of unambitious, but landing that particular job would make me very happy. I want to work for Shonda Rhimes. No, I don’t even wanna be like Shonda Rhimes because I know I’m nothing compared to her, but I just want to see and be able to be a part of the magic she does. I want to see her grind, her writing process, how she puts together ideas, and witness how she change slowly change the world one episode at a time. She’s my drive, my spirit animal, my inspiration, and motivation. I admire her a lot.

This may sound obnoxious, but I know I could work for her. I know I’m fit for the job, that I have the potential of becoming one of her associates. This is why everything I planned for my career so far leads to me being hired by Shonda, or maybe at least being able to be as good as her in telling stories, because nothing compares to the feeling of putting life in characters and making real people in love with them. I haven’t attained it yet, but one day, I will.  Someday, I’ll be proud of myself for being able to do it.

Someday, I promise.

Someday.

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